“Three Cheers for Chocolate!”

Good morning, friends.  Okay! This got my attention: According to a recent Nutrition Research study, “Candy and chocolate lovers tend to weigh less, have lower body mass indices (BMI) and waist circumferences, and have decreased levels of risk factors for cardiovascular disease (CVD) and metabolic syndrome.”  Okay, I’ll buy that! With all the other bad stuff going on in the world, it’s nice to know there’s still one guilty pleasure that we don’t need to feel guilty about. Then I hear you ask, “ Can this really be true?”

Amazon Sage can’t wait for me to fall asleep so she can check this one out in her dream-travels. What she finds is yummy. Just teasing.  What I mean to say is; what she finds is that for decades, women have known the emotional benefits of eating chocolate, especially during “that time of the month” to use a phrase from the stone age.  Then about a dozen or so years ago, it was discovered that chocolate actually stimulates the same part of the brain as marijuana. Hmmm, a quick high without the legal ramifications. 

“But wait,” you say, “What about that old drawback called weight gain?” This is the good news; This new research  tells us that eating candy and chocolate is less likely to pack on the pounds than say, a big Mac (and I don’t mean the computer).  Perhaps it's because we watch how much candy we eat a lot closer than how many fast foods we ingest. Whatever the reason, I think that calls for a celebration! I’ve got a box of chocolates; care to join me? Who cares that it’s not Valentine’s Day....  

Yikes, now I’m hearing giggling and someone whispering “You mean I can eat the whole box?” and stuff like that.  So... because I’m your friend, I will suggest that you keep in mind the old adage “Moderation is...” 

Oh, what the heck! Go for it all my pretty ones and handsome devils. Let's all join in saying “Three cheers for  chocolate!”

"Sex, Drugs, Rock and Roll"

Hello my friends. Ordinarily I do not write about people’s failings and today is no exception, so when I mention a few people’s names, I ask that you please see this posting as one of curiosity rather than of judgement. With that disclaimer, I begin with this question: “What do Britney Spears, Lindsey Lohan and Charlie Sheen have in common?” (Hint: It’s not what you may think). 

One’s mind could wander the gamut on this one; drugs, sex, music, entertainment... But how about education? I propose that the primary function of all the negative exposure these folks have garnered, based upon their varied legal and illegal exploits, is to teach obedient kids what not to so and to teach rebellious kids how to do it. 

For sure, if these stars were not so famous, their stories would hardly merit  a mention on the last page of the local rag, but because they are famous, they become unwitting role models. That’s right, role models; for children and young people whose own parents “never have time” to sit down and talk with them. You know the kind of conversations I’m talking about, sex, drugs, and all those things that make most parents squeamish. What a sad state of affairs (no pun intended), when young people must turn to the internet, magazines, and television for their information on how to act in relationships.  You might ask, “But has it really changed from a few decades ago?” Amazon Sage takes us back to the era of “Leave it to Beaver” to find out.

Back in the living rooms of the June and Ward Cleavers of the world, parents were often even more uncomfortable describing these tough subjects to their kids. It was fortunate for everybody that there was so much less destructive information readily available. Most kids made it through their ignorance phases with their lives and careers fairly intact because when parents did talk sexuality to their adolescents, it wasn’t much help. They described these talks as learning about “the birds and the bees.”  How cute. That’s because parents who were too embarrassed to speak more explicitly simply referred to the handiest models available, hoping their youngsters would learn from what was going on  right outside their windows.  It went something like this: 

“Peggy Sue, I noticed you’ve been walking home with that Jimmy fellow the past few weeks and I guess it’s time for you to learn about the birds and the bees.” Peggy Sue is silent, hoping beyond hope that she will hear something useful; secretly afraid that her mom saw her and Jimmy sneak behind the bleachers after the game Friday night. Her father continues, “So I want you to watch those birds around spring time and watch those bees too, and you’ll know what I’m talking about. Any questions?” Peggy Sue is thinking, “Yeah, how about where can I get some condoms?” She says nothing and within a month, she’s pregnant. Okay, so back then there was not enough information, but today there’s overload.

Now, you get it streaming over the web, everyday and it’s not just about the birds and bees. Kids no longer need to look out the window to find out how animals procreate. Every species, every way, every size is now represented in living color. Some people would like to say “too much information” but their voices would barely register over the porn influenced ads and shows that flood out screens. In a few short years, we have become a nation of people who live in a sex-saturated society. Is it any wonder that kids turn to celebrities for some modicum of learning? After all, at least Britney, Lindsey, and Charlie are real people, albeit occasionally highly troubled, role models. BTW, if there are any parents out there, you really can make a difference, but you have to talk with -- not at -- your kids. Hoping your day is educational in a good way, I remain, your friend.

“ Friends who turn on friends’s friends”

Good morning friends,

Just curious... what do you think this title means? “ Friends who turn on friends’s friends;” specifically in reference to the words “turn on.” I suspect your meaning has a lot to do with your personal experience. During the night, Amazon Sage dream-travelled back in time, to the study of a young author who had some very interesting things to say on the subject. Sitting across the desk from Anais Nin, our courageous explorer felt both honored and a bit of trepidation. After all, this woman’s writings can be pretty steamy. Think Henry Miller, June Mansfield, and The Tropic of Cancer. In letters between the three, Anais Nin was once described thus: 

“Anais initiated [conversations about sex] by questioning June about her lesbian experiences, but June also coaxed things along, taking perverse pleasure in provoking Anais to constantly escalating displays of passion, which she promptly told in great (and sometimes exaggerated) detail to Henry.” I’d say this is clearly one  meaning of “friends turning on friends.”

Because of our human tendency to create meanings that fit in with the way we see the world (aka, our poustou or our self-world construct), some of you will indeed interpret those words to be about friends who sexually arouse your other friends.” However, others will think it refers to a friend’s rejection of their friends’ other friends; perhaps even betrayal. Certainly, depending upon the circumstances in which the behavior occurs, either can be seen as a betrayal... or not. Imagine if we chose to apply humor or even compassion to our friend’s tendency to turn on our other friends. How might that change the eventual outcome of our friendships?  

In an upcoming blog, I will speak to some of these intriguing possibilities, but first, I must ask you to think about three pertinent questions:  First, what does it mean to you to be a friend? Second, when do you draw the line for a friend’s bad behavior? And the last one is key: Can a friendship ever get beyond one friend’s betrayal of the other? Stay tuned for more as you ponder my favorite quote from Anais Nin, “We do not see things as they are. We see things as we are.”

“The case of the four year old deported American”

Four year old Emily, a citizen of the United States, was excited at the prospect of spending time with her Grandfather in her family’s homeland.  While planning the trip, her blue eyes would shine brightly any time she was asked about the trip. Her blond hair gave her the appearance of an angel, leading people to tease her about her beauty. Because she had never travelled so far before, she felt a bit nervous about the long flight, but she also felt secure in the knowledge that her Granddaddy would be with her and he was the kindest man she’d ever known. It held the promise of a fun adventure for a shy little girl; one to remember for the rest of her life.

Following her visit, it was her parents’ plan for little Emily to travel back to New York with her Grandfather by her side.  The only problem was, the plane was diverted from its original destination. So instead of New York, the plane landed in Washington DC. Worse, once there, the Grandfather was detained by INS; not because he had done anything wrong, but because the Grandfather’s visa had expired. This meant that the little girl was held separately for many hours while the decision was made to send Grandpa back to his home country.

So much for a dream vacation that she would always remember. Instead, little Emily’s memory became one of being detained at the wrong airport, then separated from the only person she knew and trusted. But it gets worse.  Emily was then placed back on a plane and sent with her Grandfather, not to her home in New York but to another land. For all intents and purposes, little Emily was deported from her own country! And while her parents were called, the only choices given to them were these: “We will place her in foster care custody or we will send her back to her Grandfather’s home in another country... Which is it?”  The option not given to them was to drive down to Washington and pick her up. They'd heard horror stories of what happens to children in foster care. So in the face of such big government, her parents felt helpless to do anything but allow them to have their way.

I don’t know about you, but if I had a little girl who was supposed to be accompanied home by her Grandpa, from a long and potentially scary journey, only to discover that the older man was taken into custody for an expired Visa, I’d be pretty anxious. Then, if I found out that my little girl was then not allowed to continue her flight to her own home, I’d be livid. Yet, this actually happened. A frightened little girl named Emily, was treated as if she were some kind of illegal alien who could not be allowed back into her own country. I guess the powers that be decided that we must be protected from the likes of her, by george.

Even Amazon Sage was perplexed as to what to do. By the time she dream-traveled to Washington, to find out where the pretty little “villain” was being held, not only had deportation procedures begun, the girl was already gone; out of there, Kaput!  Our fearless super hero did the next best thing, she visited with the parents and suggested that they seek legal remedies. Because just like you or me, Emily’s parents love their child more than anything in the world and were astounded that this could happen this week, in this land, of the free. Are you with me on this?

Now, what if I told you I disguised the little girl’s appearance for her protection? Would that make a difference to you? Before you answer, think about it. Emily’s still only four years old, but instead of blond hair, what if it was dark brown or black? Instead of blue eyes, what if they were brown. Are you still feeling as sympathetic? If not, why not? I hate to say it, but I think her coloring makes all the difference in the world. Notice your reaction when I tell you that the little girl’s last name is Ruiz. Are you still as willing to fight for her right to be able to return home to her own family, to her own country, the way you were a few moments ago? I hope so. After all, if you're reading this post, you must be a good person. :-) Now, my sweet friends, go wake somebody up and tell them what you really think. All the Emilys of the world will thank you. 

"Give yourself to... Hope!"

Good morning, friends. Last night, I laughed when I read a quote written for the cartoon character Homer Simpson. It said "And Lord, we are especially thankful for nuclear power, the cleanest, safest energy source there is. Except for solar, which is just a pipe dream." It made me laugh in spite of myself since it so accurately reflects the thinking of a fairly large group of Americans. Those who apparently believe that anything they do not understand, is simply a myth. This, even as headlines scream how serious the nuclear emergency in Japan, has become.

As a person who chooses to see hope in the darkest of situations, I must admit, I do feel challenged. That is, until I read some releases from various governmental agencies. For the most part, government sources, particularly the military, still insist that the situation is not nearly so dire as it is made out to be; “It is just the press exploiting people’s fears.” Hoping to get at the truth, for the next few hours, I went, back and forth, reading this news story then that; wondering if the truth really is out there. It’s enough to make a person dizzy! Slowly, I sank into the bed and as I rested my head on a non-dizzy producing pillow, I drifted into restless sleep. That is where the world of Amazon Sage and her dream travels often begin.

As we time travelled, I heard Amazon Sage say something like “a picture is worth a thousand words,” and on this night’s sojourn, I saw images I'll never forget. Amazon Sage took me to the dead zone surrounding the old Chernobyl Nuclear Plant, in Russia.  Talk about creepy; there was this huge complex, a place that once bustled with life; now with no life to be seen. Buildings that undoubtably cost millions of rubles lay in ruins and the very air felt poisoned. I know, I know, it’s been long enough that the air is probably no longer poisoned, but then again, do you really want to take a chance and move back there? Obviously, the Russians do not. Here and there, of course, there was an odd scientist, with meters, geiger counters, papers and pens, scouring the metaphorical scorched earth.

As I pondered this scene, my mind wandered back to a friend who once told me he had gone to Chernobyl two weeks after the melt down. He said he was trying to make a political point. (Really?) I began to wonder whatever happened to his body since his mind was obviously already off its rocker. Funny, that I never saw him again, after that one chance meeting. That’s when I was whisked away again. Before I knew it, I was standing at Three Mile Island, here in the good ole’ U.S. of A. Brrr... that place (Three Mile), still gives me the shivers and I’m not usually cold. That’s because it was there that another old friend was dosed when she too visited “not too long after their accident.” Unfortunately, I know what happened to her. Within a few years, one of the best and brightest was lost to the world from an aggressive form of leukemia.

Finally, back in my room, in my bed, I mused over the images of not only what was, but what could be. I thought about yet another friend, this one in Japan, and how his life is forever changed. Yet, he does not panic. He does not complain. He works on, lending a hand to his friends and neighbors the way he was taught from birth to do. Ah, hope has returned, because I know that we, as human beings, are mostly like that Japanese friend. For the most part, we humans are faithful, smart, and brave. Yes, we knowingly makes choices that place our lives at risk. Yes, we are willing to offer it for the sake of our families; our fellow humans.

Hope. Sometimes it’s all we have. And when we do, it's not so important whether this or that is the ultimate truth. Hope is enough. That’s because we know in our hearts that somehow we’ll survive if we allow ourselves to heed the example of the Japanese; work together, as if our life depends on it.

“Moon River, Wider than a Mile...”

Good morning, friends. Last night, Amazon Sage dream travelled to the moon and back to discover why, for many people, last weekend meant ordinary evening routines were eclipsed by moon madness. Newscasters acted excited, even calling for photos, as they announced that the moon would rise visibly larger than it looked for the past 18 years. In response, normal folks flocked to nearby fields and beaches, camera ready. I went out into my back yard. I suppose all the hullabaloo was because the moon’s position in the sky was closer to the earth than it had in all those years. If you think about it, the moon has always been a source of mystery for the romantic and of fantasy and lore for the story tellers among us. Phrases, poems, and songs abound with moon-scapades. 

For instance, in the 17th century, the phrase “to find an elephant in the moon” meant that something one thought was there, was not. It began when an astronomer insisted that he saw an elephant in the moon, but I'll tell you a secret: It was shortly after a brief visit from our own Amazon Sage, that the “elephant” was discovered to actually be a mouse that had climbed into his telescope! 

Then there’s the phrase “minions of the moon.” It refers to night-time thieves who are particularly partial to Interstate highway rest stops and XMart parking lots. [Okay, I made the last bit up!]  But here’s something everybody should recognize. Did you know that mooning about, refers to that feeling we humans experience when we first fall in love? It’s that time in which we lose all perspective and do stupid things. Hmmm, perhaps mooning about is what accounts for so many politicians being caught with their moons exposed. (Sorry) 

Of course, in sports, business, and even in people’s personal lives, shooting for the moon has always meant to try your best to achieve your goals. Sometimes, I think that's my favorite. Needless to say, for years, psychologists and law enforcement personnel have wondered why things happen during a full moon; why there are so many more crimes committed. It could be because the thieves can finally see what they’re doing. But maybe, just maybe, there’s something else going on that excites the blood and sends the vampires and werewolves out to roam. Before you go to sleep tonight, think about that great big beautiful moon, maybe even hum a tune. Like Amazon Sage’s nightly sojourns, it’s certain to bring interesting dreams. 

“Reflections of a Culture in the Everyday Heroism of Japanese People”

Good morning, friends. Yesterday, I received an remail from a Japanese man who had apparently gotten some bad advice about what is being said, in America, about the Japanese people.

“My dear friends and relatives all over the world... Many many thanks for your deep concerns on the whole incident. I send out lots of love from here to all of you....

However, I am very sorry; personally getting sick and tired of some of the Western press who are trying to panic people. The news media broadcasts about our people, that ‘there were those who were in panic like small children...’ is not true. I have never seen any - not a single - Japanese in panic so far.  Around me, there is no Japanese who wants to save only himself or herself by leaving the rest of us behind. My kids went to work. I am just back from work. Someone has to go and work to turn the economy here; someone has to earn bread for the rest of the society to support each other; otherwise the entire country will get stuck. To send more power to the damaged areas, we turned off the lights and the heating system. No problem. Just wear more sweaters... We don't worry about it.... Go to:  http://data.d-vecs.com/prive/fixingroad.jpg  and if you think you want to do something for us, please pray for Japan.”

My response to this Japanese man’s frustration, did not need Amazon Sage, this time. This is what I wrote to him, in response:

“I am an American citizen and I am so happy to hear that Japanese people are trying to keep their lives and their country going while the disasters from the earthquake, tsunami, and radiation are being addressed. I want you to know that the news I listen to and watch must be different from what you are hearing since I have heard only the most positive things about the Japanese people; how brave, industrious, and compassionate they are.

"I too, have a very close Japanese friend over there, who could easily have come over here, to the US and stayed with our family. Instead, he stays there and sleeps in his car so that he is better able to assist his friends and neighbors. An American military man whom I know quite well, is also there, as a relief worker. Unfortunately, he does not have the proper medicine to protect himself from thyroid damage because so many people in the USA have panicked and bought up all the supplies. So he is doing what many Japanese people are doing to protect themselves; he is eating kelp." [Really Americans? We are so selfish that we buy up all the supplies, that are much more needed there, because WE are scared?]

But back to my response: "The last thing the good people of Japan need right now is to hear worrisome reports about their behaviors. I can assure you that if there are news stations or newspapers saying uncomplimentary things about the Japanese people, then the readers of those rags are most certainly too ignorant for you to give them a second thought.

As for me and every person I know or have heard from, it is clear that each Japanese person who continues to go on with his or her life in the midst of all that is happening, serves as as a shining example for all of humanity; a model for how to act in times of great suffering. Therefore, it is with great respect that I remain, your friend from across the world."

I will end this post with a suggestion to all citizens of our own great country, the USA: Please stop buying and hoarding all the anti nuclear medical supplies. You are keeping them from the people who need them the most; our military people in Japan; all the relief workers; and the Japanese people. They need them right now! We don’t. Have a blessed day, my friends.